Have you ever been in one of those situations where everything was up in the air, with so many things hinging on the decisions of others that there wasn't much you could do about it? For me that was my last two or three months.
Normally such uncertainty has me climbing up a wall with frustration, but this time I really did my best to be trusting and praiseful. And as I worked out the few things that I could while setting aside the rest, it all fell into place in a much better way than what I was expecting.
So now I am doing a happy dance, as I see how patience during the uncertainty really paid off, and I am very excited about the future.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Driving in Nepal
Things I’ve learned during driving practice
• It’s fun to weave the bike in and out of cars (this terrified me when I first started driving)
• Pedestrians think they own the road especially side roads and tend to ignore horns (though I can’t really blame them, most of the time people are honking for no reason)
• There is no line down the middle of the road, real or imaginary. Instead the space between the rows of cars moving in opposite directions is there for motorbikes to play games of chicken as they pass all the cars (don’t worry, I’m always the chicken in the end)
• Bicycles believe that they are cars and like to get in the way (or as my driving instructor told me “bicycle is zig zag”.
• Traffic is not really as scary as it looks. Just follow one simple rule: assume that all drivers, bicycles, and pedestrians are going to jump in front of you at any given moment and be prepared to stop or weave around them; then be pleasantly surprised when they don’t.
Now I’m working up the courage to try to get a licence. Here is what you have to do for the test in Nepal. You need to weave your bike in and out of a row of traffic cones. While doing this your feet should never touch the ground. Most people fail this test the first time around.
• It’s fun to weave the bike in and out of cars (this terrified me when I first started driving)
• Pedestrians think they own the road especially side roads and tend to ignore horns (though I can’t really blame them, most of the time people are honking for no reason)
• There is no line down the middle of the road, real or imaginary. Instead the space between the rows of cars moving in opposite directions is there for motorbikes to play games of chicken as they pass all the cars (don’t worry, I’m always the chicken in the end)
• Bicycles believe that they are cars and like to get in the way (or as my driving instructor told me “bicycle is zig zag”.
• Traffic is not really as scary as it looks. Just follow one simple rule: assume that all drivers, bicycles, and pedestrians are going to jump in front of you at any given moment and be prepared to stop or weave around them; then be pleasantly surprised when they don’t.
Now I’m working up the courage to try to get a licence. Here is what you have to do for the test in Nepal. You need to weave your bike in and out of a row of traffic cones. While doing this your feet should never touch the ground. Most people fail this test the first time around.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Happy Valentines
This year is the first in a while where I didn't have some special someone somewhere to wish a Happy Valentines Day to. Even if I wasn't in a commited relationship there's always been some person of interest to send off a note to, call up, buy a little gift, or wait anxiously to hear from. Yesterday I thought about it and realized that there was nobody. And you know what? It made me really happy.
In fact, I think it was the best Valentines I've had in a while. Because by taking the focus off romantic interests I thought about all the other love and good things that I have in my life, and I felt so blessed. I think sometimes the desire for romance, for dating, for all the complications that go along with the whole scene distracts us from the things that are a lot more important and satisfying.
I live with good friends who I can show love and concern for. I have a lot more friends that I get to see regularly and spend time with. I enjoy my work and get a lot of satisfaction out of doing it. I like the place I live. There are some exciting new opportunities coming up, not finalized yet, but that I'm looking forward to. I've learned a lot of things in the last year, and come to terms with the things about myself that have long frustrated me and made me feel incomplete. In short, I'm happy with the place I'm at in my life right now.
If some opportunity for romance and a relationship comes along and surprises me, then great. But I'm not looking for it. I don't feel like I need someone else to complete me.
Love comes along to us in many different forms, each one unique and beautiful. Every day we can feel touches of love in our lives. So, this post goes out to everyone who doesn't have a special someone to spend Valentine's Day with. Why sit around feeling sad that you're alone? In fact, why feel alone at all? If this is a day to celebrate love, then lets celebrate it in what ever form it choses to enter our lives in, and lets share some of that love with those around us.
"If we know that God loves us, then we know everything's going to be okay."
In fact, I think it was the best Valentines I've had in a while. Because by taking the focus off romantic interests I thought about all the other love and good things that I have in my life, and I felt so blessed. I think sometimes the desire for romance, for dating, for all the complications that go along with the whole scene distracts us from the things that are a lot more important and satisfying.
I live with good friends who I can show love and concern for. I have a lot more friends that I get to see regularly and spend time with. I enjoy my work and get a lot of satisfaction out of doing it. I like the place I live. There are some exciting new opportunities coming up, not finalized yet, but that I'm looking forward to. I've learned a lot of things in the last year, and come to terms with the things about myself that have long frustrated me and made me feel incomplete. In short, I'm happy with the place I'm at in my life right now.
If some opportunity for romance and a relationship comes along and surprises me, then great. But I'm not looking for it. I don't feel like I need someone else to complete me.
Love comes along to us in many different forms, each one unique and beautiful. Every day we can feel touches of love in our lives. So, this post goes out to everyone who doesn't have a special someone to spend Valentine's Day with. Why sit around feeling sad that you're alone? In fact, why feel alone at all? If this is a day to celebrate love, then lets celebrate it in what ever form it choses to enter our lives in, and lets share some of that love with those around us.
"If we know that God loves us, then we know everything's going to be okay."
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Perfect Love
In the last post I wrote about guilt and how it’s a very bad driver to have in the front seat of your life. In this one I want to touch briefly on fear. I think fear is possibly even more common of a driver than guilt, as there are so many things to be fearful of.
With the start of this year I have been considering some new ventures, and I have to say that I have been hit with many fears. Fears of making the wrong decision. Fears of not making a decision at all (procrastination being my usual reaction to facing major choices). And mostly the fear of time.
This year I will turn 30 and passing that milestone has prompted me to re-examine a lot of things in an effort to see if I’m happy with where my life is at right now. I’m happy to say that I’ve come to the decision that I can be content with and even proud of most of what I’ve done this far. But coming to that conclusion has not been without a few sleepless nights where I worried about the time that’s passing by.
A verse I memorized early in childhood comes to mind whenever I think about fears. 1John 4:18 tells us, “Perfect love casts out fear.” Even though I’ve heard this many times it’s always been a bit of a conundrum for me. When I think about the antidote to fear I’m far more likely to come up with choices such as bravery, hope, faith, and trust, rather than love. But I think the answer to this puzzle is found in the words “perfect love”.
When we think of love the first example that usually comes to mind is the love between a man and woman. This is one of the least perfect examples of love. There are countless imperfections to be found in each relationship. A closer one would probably be the love of a parent for their child, but still as a human relation this is filled with imperfections. In fact, I believe it would be impossible to find an example of “perfect love” in a world filled with human imperfection.
Therefore to find the true meaning of “perfect love” we have to look beyond human limitations. Earlier in the same chapter we are told, “God is love,” 1John 4:8. So to find the perfection in love we have to look to the only thing which is perfect – God and His love for us.
As I think about the fact that God loves me, that He made me, that He has a plan for my life and even promises to bring good out of every situation including the ones that I get myself into that are outside of His will, all the fears dissipate, and I can find the peace in His perfect love for me that casts out all fear.
With the start of this year I have been considering some new ventures, and I have to say that I have been hit with many fears. Fears of making the wrong decision. Fears of not making a decision at all (procrastination being my usual reaction to facing major choices). And mostly the fear of time.
This year I will turn 30 and passing that milestone has prompted me to re-examine a lot of things in an effort to see if I’m happy with where my life is at right now. I’m happy to say that I’ve come to the decision that I can be content with and even proud of most of what I’ve done this far. But coming to that conclusion has not been without a few sleepless nights where I worried about the time that’s passing by.
A verse I memorized early in childhood comes to mind whenever I think about fears. 1John 4:18 tells us, “Perfect love casts out fear.” Even though I’ve heard this many times it’s always been a bit of a conundrum for me. When I think about the antidote to fear I’m far more likely to come up with choices such as bravery, hope, faith, and trust, rather than love. But I think the answer to this puzzle is found in the words “perfect love”.
When we think of love the first example that usually comes to mind is the love between a man and woman. This is one of the least perfect examples of love. There are countless imperfections to be found in each relationship. A closer one would probably be the love of a parent for their child, but still as a human relation this is filled with imperfections. In fact, I believe it would be impossible to find an example of “perfect love” in a world filled with human imperfection.
Therefore to find the true meaning of “perfect love” we have to look beyond human limitations. Earlier in the same chapter we are told, “God is love,” 1John 4:8. So to find the perfection in love we have to look to the only thing which is perfect – God and His love for us.
As I think about the fact that God loves me, that He made me, that He has a plan for my life and even promises to bring good out of every situation including the ones that I get myself into that are outside of His will, all the fears dissipate, and I can find the peace in His perfect love for me that casts out all fear.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Who is in the driver's seat?
What drives your life? This is a question I reflected on this morning, as I work my way through the book “Purpose Driven Life” by Rick Warren.
Rick poses several possibilities that drive many people’s lives.
Are you driven by guilt? Are there things in your past that you regret? Do you spend time reminiscing on painful memories, rehashing past mistakes? Are you so afraid of repeating them that you no longer take risks?
We all have things that we can feel guilty for. Aside from the many small mistakes of life, when I look back, I can focus most of my guilt on the one time I truly made a disaster out of everything around me. Because I was going through a difficult period, I allowed my negative emotions to get the better of me and did and said things that effectively destroyed the relationships I had with the people around me. I could see myself shattering all that was good in my life, and at the same time felt powerless to stop it.
Eventually as I turned things over to God, He helped me to put all the broken pieces back together. But it took a lot of time, and some of the damage will never be fully repaired. For a long time after I was driven by guilt resulting from this time period and the year leading up to it. In talking to others, though, I realized that we’ve all gone through things like this. Everyone has at some time or another made mistakes so big we feel they can never be fixed.
Acceptance of those mistakes frees us from the guilt attached. God forgives. Most of the time the people around us, if they truly care about us, forgive as well. But we also have to forgive ourselves. We have to kick guilt out of the driver’s seat and replace it by God’s love and grace. Guilt will take us no where, and really, it serves no useful purpose. There is no way to rewind time and change what happened. It’s in the past, therefore we must accept it, and use it to move us forward into the future.
Some of the other things people are driven by are resentment, fear, materialism, or other people’s expectations. I realized that at various times in my life I have been driven by each of these things. But is that who I really want in the driver’s seat of my life? Definitely not. I would compare this to being in a car with an unsafe, unskilled, or somewhat impaired driver. All things I have experienced, and wouldn’t want to experience again.
Additionally I wouldn’t want to be the one in the driver’s seat. Even though I have taken driving lessons, I’m not very good at it, and tend to get very scared and jumpy. But when you put God and His purpose for you in the driver’s seat, that’s like being in a car with someone whose driving skills you have perfect faith in. Like going on a long trip with my dad at the wheel. I can relax, take a nap, read a book, listen to music. I know he’s a safe driver, and I trust him to get us to our destination.
So who’s driving your car of life? It’s something important to reflect on now and again, to make sure that we’ve got the right driver, and are heading where we want to go.
Rick poses several possibilities that drive many people’s lives.
Are you driven by guilt? Are there things in your past that you regret? Do you spend time reminiscing on painful memories, rehashing past mistakes? Are you so afraid of repeating them that you no longer take risks?
We all have things that we can feel guilty for. Aside from the many small mistakes of life, when I look back, I can focus most of my guilt on the one time I truly made a disaster out of everything around me. Because I was going through a difficult period, I allowed my negative emotions to get the better of me and did and said things that effectively destroyed the relationships I had with the people around me. I could see myself shattering all that was good in my life, and at the same time felt powerless to stop it.
Eventually as I turned things over to God, He helped me to put all the broken pieces back together. But it took a lot of time, and some of the damage will never be fully repaired. For a long time after I was driven by guilt resulting from this time period and the year leading up to it. In talking to others, though, I realized that we’ve all gone through things like this. Everyone has at some time or another made mistakes so big we feel they can never be fixed.
Acceptance of those mistakes frees us from the guilt attached. God forgives. Most of the time the people around us, if they truly care about us, forgive as well. But we also have to forgive ourselves. We have to kick guilt out of the driver’s seat and replace it by God’s love and grace. Guilt will take us no where, and really, it serves no useful purpose. There is no way to rewind time and change what happened. It’s in the past, therefore we must accept it, and use it to move us forward into the future.
Some of the other things people are driven by are resentment, fear, materialism, or other people’s expectations. I realized that at various times in my life I have been driven by each of these things. But is that who I really want in the driver’s seat of my life? Definitely not. I would compare this to being in a car with an unsafe, unskilled, or somewhat impaired driver. All things I have experienced, and wouldn’t want to experience again.
Additionally I wouldn’t want to be the one in the driver’s seat. Even though I have taken driving lessons, I’m not very good at it, and tend to get very scared and jumpy. But when you put God and His purpose for you in the driver’s seat, that’s like being in a car with someone whose driving skills you have perfect faith in. Like going on a long trip with my dad at the wheel. I can relax, take a nap, read a book, listen to music. I know he’s a safe driver, and I trust him to get us to our destination.
So who’s driving your car of life? It’s something important to reflect on now and again, to make sure that we’ve got the right driver, and are heading where we want to go.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Mountain Paintings
Here are two of the recent paintings I have done. I will try to upload more as I get the time and manage to get good pictures of them. Unfortuantely some of the other photos didn't turn out.
This picture is the first one I have sold so far.
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| Sunrise on Fishtail Mountain |
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| Fewa Lake & Anapurna Range, Pokhara |
This picture is the first one I have sold so far.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
My New Year's resolution and discovery
As at the end of every year, I was thinking about my goals for the New Year, both practical and personal. The practical ones are always easier to come up with. The ones for personal growth require a bit more introspection, and I feel, can tend to be a bit more discouraging. Some of these are things I’ve tried to improve in for a long time without significant success.
This year the main one I know I need to work on is to be calmer, to not take things so seriously, to not overreact when people or situations are upsetting. As this is a long standing personal weakness, I was thinking about how to actually make this change a permanent one.
In the morning of the 31st we went to the Sisters of Charity’s home for dying and destitute elderly people. Previously we sang for the children they care for who are recovering from tuberculosis, and the sisters asked if we would come and sing for the elderly as well.
While singing I thought about the love and unselfishness that enables these sisters to care for others day in and day out. A quote from Mother Teresa came to life as I looked at the people around me. "I see Jesus in every human being," she said. "I say to myself, this is hungry Jesus, I must feed him. This is sick Jesus. This one has leprosy or gangrene; I must wash him and tend to him. I serve because I love Jesus."
I started to think about what this means—to see Jesus in every human being. So many times I have heard the instruction to be like Jesus, to represent Him to others, to think about what Jesus would do. I’ve tried that, and so many times I’ve failed at it. Jesus was a perfect representation of God’s love, and I am only an imperfect human being.
But what if I looked at it the other way around? Instead of trying to be Jesus, to try to treat others as I would if they were Jesus.
I thought of how the greeting in Nepal, “namaste” literally means “I bow to the God that is inside you”. The Bible tells us that we are made in God’s image, and I do believe that each person carries a part of God inside them.
As I carried on with my day, I kept reflecting on this idea. Instead of reacting in frustration to someone I could tell myself instead: “This is sad Jesus, I need to encourage him. This is tired Jesus, I must show patience and do what I can to help.”
So that is my resolution for the New Year – to treat each person with the respect, kindness, and patience that I would show to Jesus were He right in front of me. I’ll still make mistakes, get impatient and frustrated – I already made a big one shortly after deciding this – but hopefully over time, as I put this into practice it will become a part of my way of thinking and help me to make the changes permanent ones.
This year the main one I know I need to work on is to be calmer, to not take things so seriously, to not overreact when people or situations are upsetting. As this is a long standing personal weakness, I was thinking about how to actually make this change a permanent one.
In the morning of the 31st we went to the Sisters of Charity’s home for dying and destitute elderly people. Previously we sang for the children they care for who are recovering from tuberculosis, and the sisters asked if we would come and sing for the elderly as well.
While singing I thought about the love and unselfishness that enables these sisters to care for others day in and day out. A quote from Mother Teresa came to life as I looked at the people around me. "I see Jesus in every human being," she said. "I say to myself, this is hungry Jesus, I must feed him. This is sick Jesus. This one has leprosy or gangrene; I must wash him and tend to him. I serve because I love Jesus."
I started to think about what this means—to see Jesus in every human being. So many times I have heard the instruction to be like Jesus, to represent Him to others, to think about what Jesus would do. I’ve tried that, and so many times I’ve failed at it. Jesus was a perfect representation of God’s love, and I am only an imperfect human being.
But what if I looked at it the other way around? Instead of trying to be Jesus, to try to treat others as I would if they were Jesus.
I thought of how the greeting in Nepal, “namaste” literally means “I bow to the God that is inside you”. The Bible tells us that we are made in God’s image, and I do believe that each person carries a part of God inside them.
As I carried on with my day, I kept reflecting on this idea. Instead of reacting in frustration to someone I could tell myself instead: “This is sad Jesus, I need to encourage him. This is tired Jesus, I must show patience and do what I can to help.”
So that is my resolution for the New Year – to treat each person with the respect, kindness, and patience that I would show to Jesus were He right in front of me. I’ll still make mistakes, get impatient and frustrated – I already made a big one shortly after deciding this – but hopefully over time, as I put this into practice it will become a part of my way of thinking and help me to make the changes permanent ones.
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